Back in Hospital

So on Saturday after all the panicking on Friday I was justified so I was back in hospital and kept overnight. I had a CT scan which showed the mass is bigger and growing again which I had kinda gathered seeing as I couldn’t breathe properly, my cough was back and so was my swelling. I was given steroids which are ok and keep my symptoms down to a certain extent but they wont hold it forever. They also make you really high or they can do but they also make you really low which I’ve experienced more than the high if I’m honest. So anyway Dr. Haynes has been off due to family circumstances so I’ve been dealing with Dr. Macmillan, an apt name for a cancer consultant I thought. Anyway I had a cannula for the CT scan but with no problems, my line isn’t working, letting stuff in or out which is worrying but they are going to speak to Dr. Haynes about it tomorrow (Thursday) when we are assured he will be back and come and speak to us.

They also have the Pet scan results I believe so we should know more. I’m very nervous about what they are going to say. It could be a big day, well chances are it will be. I’m back on the ‘bellly injections’ which thin my blood and help the mass pressing on my main arteries, as painful as they are I am grateful for them at the min cos least I know they are helping. And the nurses that do them understand. I have no complainst about the nurses, they are all fantasic and so are all the ward doctors and consultants. The good news is still that I have stem cells which means they have options, bad news is GEMP didn’t work essentially. Well I guess it did, it just didn’t sustain it for long enough.
Oh I had my heart scan and nothing has comeback from it so I think its all ok and my heart rate seems stable right now so I’m praying it stays that way. My problem is my tumour is growing so quickly now, they need to act fast so I think we will deffo see someone tomorrow esp as my steroids are now at an end. I also have to have my blood sugar levels checked cos steroids increase them which mine have. Its fun, they prick your finger to make it bleed and then put the blood on this little machine to check it, it always looked really painful but it really isnt!

My line is worrying me but I guess I’ll know more about that tomorrow. I am in a little room with me and one other lady in it who is nice enough but not very chatty. I enjoy having mum and dad here and bex when she was around. And Gemma coming to visit today was great, I really enjoyed it. I think Claire and my nan’s are coming over the weekend as well so that will be good too. I watched the bill tonight too which was good! Least some TV is alright!

My ‘Steroid Appetite’ is well and truly back, I’m loving yogurts, ham sandwiches and Maltesers especially at the moment! I’ve been doing those Killer Sudoku’s which are really good for killing time but keep frustrating me as I’m so crap at it. I feel ok emotionally, rollercoastery! (if that’s even a word), I can be soooo down but the next min feel ok so its literally a case of taking each minute at a time! I’ve cried a bit but the last 2 days haven’t been too bad. My PET scan was boring as anything but least it split the day up!! And I’ve been getting dressed in the day so I feel a bit more normal too. I’d love some hours at home though with a proper meal and some sky football though with that Liverpool score I’ve just seen maybe a lack of footie isn’t a bad thing! Think I will stay up for match of the day anyway though. I need to wait for my cough medicine till half eleven. Fun stuff.

My routine consists of being woke up at 6am for obs (blood pressure, sats and temp) then sleeping till 8am which is breakfast, waking up for that, having tablets and bed changed. Then I watch some TV or do a puzzle till Mum and dad come. I watched Jeremy Kyle today which was pretty entertaining. The rest of the day is spent waiting for food, eating, checking the net now, sleeping and waiting for consultants. All in all pretty boring. Gosh that depresses me writing it! Maybe I should stop! Tomorrow I hope to access lifesite so I can chat to people.

And here’s to the meeting with Dr. Haynes….scary stuff……