Ice Lollies

Well I feel a bit better today, I’ve barely been on oxygen and my breathing feels a lot better than it did yetsreday, the doctor thinks its cos the fluids have slowed down! Thank goodness!! Though I don’t wanna jinx anything so keep your fingers crossed I carry on feeling this way! No sickness since Monday night again but I don’t wanna jinx anything cos it took a few days last time to kick in so maybe this is the calm before the storm! No sore mouth yet either but I’m addicted to ice lollies so maybe they are helping!

I had to suck on them while they gave me one of the chemo drugs and ever since I’ve had this weird craving, I can’t stop eating them at all!!! And I’m getting cravings for like fruit, I just had an apple and if you know me then you’ll know that is weird!!! I’m getting some starburst sweets tomorrow and more lollies and orange squash – my appetite is sooo weird right now!!

I actually forgot to say yesterday cos I felt so crap that I had my stem cells back in, it went fine genereally, the nurse stays with you the whole time and it takes about an hour, its like having a blood transfusion except quicker! And they monitor your obs like every 5 mins. I went a bit hot and a bit breathless and the doctor came in to check me over but I was ok in the end and they were able to carry on. I didn’t taste the weird taste in my mouth though my mouth did feel a bit weird like I couldn’t swallow properly. But generally it was uneventful and now it’s a case of waiting for them to work! It can take 10 days for my counts to rise so its gonna be a rough ride for a week or so in terms of feeling washed out and also I’m really prone to infection now.

I got a lovely surprise at 6pm this evening when not only did I have my clexane injection as normal which did bloody hurt today!! They also gave me my GCSF injections – apparently I’m starting them again now to raise my counts! Fun stuff – so 2 injections to look forward to each day though at least GCSF aren’t as bad though the side effects of aching can be, but being in here I’ll be allowed some good strong pain relief so I’m not too worried.

I feel ok in myself today, I spoke to mum about stuff I wrote last night and I also rang the Lymphoma association for a chat which was useful and tomorrow a psychologist is coming to see me so I think that will help a lot. Alison, the stem cell nurse came to see me today to see how I was which was really nice and again all the nurses up here have been great in looking after me.

The downside at the min is that everyone is ill, both mum and dad can’t visit now so I’m a bit of a loner. It’s frustrating and upsetting but it can’t be helped and with me being at my most prone to infection at the min it just isn’t worth the risk of them coming. I’ll cope and we’ll get through it and it’s only one day because Becky can come all day Friday and spend the day here. Nan is bringing some stuff in the morning and sooty is coming in the afternoon to keep me company otherwise I think I might just go crazy sat here on my own all day!! So I really appreciate that!
I’m still suffering badly with the runs (sorry again) but they said as soon as they know its not an infection they can give me something to help it so I’m gonna keep pestering!!!

Right on that note I think I shall go……..night night xxx